Why First Looks at Weddings Are Overrated (From a Wedding Photographer’s Perspective)

Should You Do a First Look?

As a destination wedding photographer based in Raleigh, NC, I regularly help couples work through this consideration as we are building their wedding day timeline. Should we do a first look before the ceremony?

Many photographers and planners argue that a first look reduces stress and frees up your wedding-day timeline. But in my experience photographing weddings, I’ve found the opposite is often true: first looks are overrated.

The Popular Argument for First Looks

Plenty of photographers swear by them. The reasoning usually goes like this:

• A first look calms nerves by letting you see each other early.

• You can get most portraits done before the ceremony.

• It gives you time to enjoy cocktail hour.

Sounds ideal, right? In reality, it rarely works out that seamlessly.

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The Hidden Downsides of First Looks

Cramming the Timeline

When couples want a first look just to make cocktail hour, the result is often a chaotic pre-ceremony schedule. We’re forced to fit in:

• Full wedding party portraits

• Bride & groom portraits

• Bridesmaids and groomsmen group shots

• Immediate family portraits

All before the ceremony even begins. Instead of easing stress, this creates it.

Family Members Arriving Early

Your parents, grandparents, and family have to be on-site hours ahead of time. For family that's traveling into town for the wedding, that often means extra travel coordination — and less time for your loved ones to simply enjoy the day.

Less Time for Getting Ready Photos

Pre-ceremony is when I capture flatlays, detail shots, and natural moments with your bridal party. With a first look, these often get cut short — and those storytelling details are part what make your wedding album feel complete.

Longer Photography Coverage (and Higher Cost)

If portraits start earlier, but you still want coverage through your send-off, as your photographer, I may need to start the day much earlier. That often means adding more hours to your package.

Harsh Midday Lighting

As a true-to-color wedding photographer, I know lighting makes or breaks your portraits. One reason cocktail hour is such a popular time for wedding portraits is because is typically aligns with the soft, "golden hour" evening light. When first looks happen in early in the day and all of the portraits follow, the sun is typically overhead and shadows are harsh — the least flattering time for photos.

The Case for Skipping the First Look

More Relaxed Morning

Without the pressure of squeezing in all your portraits early, you’ll have a calmer, more enjoyable pre-ceremony experience.

Better Lighting Later

Ceremonies typically end in late afternoon, which means post-ceremony portraits fall during softer, golden-hour light.

Manageable Photo Sessions

Instead of cramming everything in before the ceremony, the day naturally breaks into sections:

• Before the ceremony: Bridesmaids and groomsmen separately

• After the ceremony: Family portraits, couple portraits, and the full wedding party

This keeps energy levels high and avoids photo fatigue.

Genuine Aisle Reaction

There’s nothing like the look on your partner’s face when they see you walking down the aisle. Skipping a first look preserves that once-in-a-lifetime moment.

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Final Thoughts: Do What Feels Right

At the end of the day, it’s your wedding. But if you’re torn, my advice is this: skip the first look. You’ll have better light, more natural moments, and a more relaxed wedding morning.

If you want the best of both worlds, consider a private touch. This is where you and your partner share a quiet moment together before the ceremony — maybe holding hands around a doorway, exchanging letters, or even reading your personal vows privately. You still get that emotional connection without sacrificing the aisle reaction, the flow of your timeline, or the benefits of waiting until later for portraits.

Ready to Plan Your Dream Wedding Photos?

I’m a destination wedding photographer based in Raleigh, NC, available for weddings across North Carolina, all the way to California, or to wherever your love will take me! My photography style is true to color, and focused on fun, candid movement — so your photos feel as real and vibrant as the moments themselves.

Click HERE to chat about your wedding day.